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Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Lost

I'm lost... I can't find myself.  
I can't sit still... My patterns comfort me
Red hard candies, no mixing of food
Touch one side and then the other
Counting, rocking, staring into space

This is not where I want to be
This is not comfortable for me

It is familiar... a strange feeling of home
Maybe I don't deserve any better
Maybe I am where I belong
I feel bad, feel worthless, feel sad
I can't remember how to get back

This is not where I want to be
This is not comfortable for me

I try to speak but feel muted
I try to fight but feel hopeless
My needs fall on deaf ears 
To those telling me how to be
I've been here before and they haven't seen

This is not where I want to be
This is not comfortable for me

I keep fighting
For what... I'm not sure
I get lost... hopefully not for long
Each time I get lost I am closer to me
I have to remember I've done it before 

Today I'm not where I want to be
I will hope tomorrow I will find me





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